5 years ago many people told me that a kid would change my life. Life as I know it will cease to exist. Honestly, I just didn’t get it. I don’t know if it was the bulging tummy or the hormones playing a trick on me but I simply refused to believe that. I knew life would change. But I didn’t think it would be that extreme. Now I not only know they were right, but also that they were being kind.
Many a time I feel like I am being controlled by this alien creature that has somehow planted a chip in my head with which it can manipulate me and monitor and control every thought process. I am sure it happened when I zonked out in the labour room minutes before Minime arrived. How else is it possible that the most self centered thoughts, within a matter of seconds, become about Minime? Like this one: “This yarn will be perfect for my scarf…or the handbag she asked me to knit her”. Or this one: ” I want those blueberry muffins RIGHT NOW…actually let me save them for her“. The tragedy is not that I think about her all the time. The tragedy is that I think about her even when there’s 4 box fulls of yarn. The tragedy is that I feel the same way about each and every skein of yarn in those boxes. The tragedy is that I think that way even when there are about 50 muffins left and I want to have just a couple. What is it with mommies? Do we really think 48 muffins are not going to be enough for a 4 year old or that she would want to own 700 thousand handbags? That’s why I say, it’s not them. It’s us and the chip.